The Myth Of Certainty

I really wanted to touch on the topic of certainty from the perspective that certainty is a myth. With everything that's going on in the world right now people are feeling insecure and uncertain about things in their life or about what their future might hold. I would like to use a quote from John Allen Paulos to sum up the theme of this episode.

“Uncertainty is the only certainty there is and knowing how to live with insecurity is the only security.”

When you get into a relationship, you're never certain if it will last. You might hope it does and do your best to make it so, but you have no control over the outcome. When you get a job, you don't know if it's yours for life. You might do everything you can to make it so, but you have no control over the outcome. When you start a business, you can pull out all the stops, but success is never guaranteed. Yet somehow, we manage to do all those things even though we can’t be certain on any of their outcomes.

What's happening right now is that people are feeling even more uncertain because there are a lot of things outside of our control. I get that. What I’d like to share with you today is not how to gain certainty because one can never be certain – we can only take actions that lead to outcomes. Instead let's look at ways that we can feel more stable in uncertainty and comfortable with not feeling secure.

Embrace uncertainty as a natural part of life and learn to let go. 

Pause, take a breath and let it go. Change is not easy, but necessary and while you may not always be able to control an outcome, you have control over your response to it. When I say ‘let go’ it doesn’t mean inaction or being passive, instead it means letting go of old notions of what was to make room for the new. It means surrendering to the fact that you can’t control everything in your life.

Replace expectations with plans. Use wisdom and careful thought to guide you forward and know that it’s also ok to pause and take a breath.

What you’re really seeking is a sense of control because again certainty is a myth.

Focus on what you can control.

What are some of the things in your life that you have some control over? Decide what you feed your body, decide what you feed your mind because these have an effect on you. Add some daily rituals into your life or continue with the ones that currently work for you because consistency helps you to gain some control in your life and it allows you to remain focused on the things that are important – your physical, mental and emotional wellbeing.

Uncertainty can be healthy. It activates our "fight or flight" response - the sympathetic nervous system, which triggers adrenaline to help us make a move. So, make a move! What are some of the things you can take action on right now? This you can decide, this you can control. Not the outcome, but the actions. Start there…

Express gratitude.  Magnify what’s good in your life. Feeling uncertain can often make us focus on what we don’t have in our life. Instead focus on what you do have. Be grateful for all the things you have now, because now is all you really have. Gratitude breeds positive emotions. It can help us to detach from anxious thoughts and behaviours. It encourages more love and compassion and we need so much of that in the world.

Stay grounded

It’s easy to get caught up in the anxiety and panic caused by uncertainty so it’s important to remain grounded. You must be like the tree with strong roots fully planted in the earth, swaying in the storm until it passes. So many things can help us feel strongly rooted and grounded. For some it might be dancing, listening to music, singing, sounding, getting the body moving – all of these things can be helpful. Or you might have a dedicated grounding practice. If you don’t and would like to try something new, make sure to download the bonus audio I’ve created to help you bring your energy into a relaxed and stable place that allows you to be more grounded. It’s a simple visualisation and energy practice that I use to connect my energy with the earth and feel more stable. Just check out the link below this episode.

We have a unique opportunity right now to start with a blank canvas and to create a new piece of art, to explore new ways of being, thinking and doing and to take a moment to reflect on our lives. A year ago, you could not be certain of today and today you can’t be certain of tomorrow. Certainty is a myth. The good news is that was always the case so what you do now will make all the difference in what happens next. So, choose to be the best version of yourself right now.

Ask yourself, what would my best self do to be of service?

BONUS GROUNDING VISUALISATION (Click link)